A decade!

Ten years.  We have been married for ten years.  TEN YEARS?!?!  That seems insane.  At the time, it was the next logical step.  We started dating in October of 1998 - during our senior year.  As much as I insisted that we should be nonexclusive - not that I was seeing anyone else, but because I didn't want our relationship to affect our college plans - he eventually won me over.  In February 1999, I agreed that we could date exclusively.  However in July of 1999, he broke up with me.  I still find it amusing that at that time he told me that I wasn't "the one."  

We both ended up at Iowa State in the fall of 1999 and because we still had mutual friends, our paths crossed once again.  We were broken up for a year and a half, however during that time, we managed to maintained a friendship, even while we were with other people.  During the winter of 2000, one might say that Russell came to his senses, but I say that I was the one who started dating someone else and he didn't like that so much.  At this point, he made it known that he was interested in getting back together and that this time, it would be for the long haul.

I had a decision to make.  I was with someone who pretty much worshipped the ground I walked on, but I had the opportunity to be with the one person with whom I could very clearly see my future - my best friend.  It took time for me to officially tie up my loose ends and then we both went home for winter break.  We went out to dinner on New Year's Eve 2000.  As we were sitting in the parking lot of Macaroni Grill, he turned to me and said "I'd really like to take my girlfriend out to dinner tonight, so what do you say?"  It's pretty obvious what I said.

Russell made it very clear that his intention was that we would eventually get married.  I made it equally clear that I was going to earn my degree before I got married.  Then 9/11 happened.  September 11th, 2001 - many of us remember what we were doing when we heard about the attacks on the World Trade Center, but can any of you say that these attacks altered the course of your life?  I can.  Following these attacks, Russell decided that he would join the Marines.  So, with my full support and the eventual blessing of his family, it was official.  Russell was going to be a Marine.  

In addition to my own studies, I was suddenly helping Russell study Marine history, ranks, etc.  He left for Bootcamp during the summer of 2002.  While most college couples were worried about where they were going to party next weekend, suddenly we were faced with being separated for 13 weeks until I got to see him at his graduation and then several more weeks for his specialty school.  (Little did we know that this extra-ordinary obstacle that we faced would set a precedence for our  future.)  

Our time apart merely solidified our commitment to each other.  Suddenly, actual plans were being put into place for our future.  As I powered through my final classes, studying for the GRE, and applying to grad school.  We decided that we were going to move in together in Omaha after I graduated.  One final roadblock stood in my way.  I needed to tell my Dad about our plan, which I did on my next visit.  This was one of the most terrifying conversations that I had to date.  Little did I know, that my Dad already had some inkling as to what was going on.

My graduation was set for May 2003.  Russell wasn't able to get out of drill to attend.  We didn't realize at the time what this meant, but it all became clear in time.  We moved back to Omaha in July 2003.  On July, 19th 2003, Russell proposed to me.  We were planning a September wedding until that fateful day in February when Russell was informed that he was going to Iraq.  Russell insisted that we get married before he left.  I was worried about the date being moved up on us, so I decided that I might as well have a fun anniversary.  So, we were married on March 17th, 2004.

At the time, I thought we were so old and so mature.  Like I said, it was the next logical move.  But, I look back and think about how YOUNG we were.  Holy Moley, we were babies!!  And yet we had already been through so much.  And we would endure so much more.

So much has changed in the last 10 years, yet the important things have stayed the same.  I would never have predicted that we'd be standing where we are today.  But, I'm so glad to be standing here with my best friend, celebrating everything that we have overcome, the three beautiful children that we've created, and the plans for the future that we continue to make.

Happy anniversary, Russell.  I look forward to many, many more.

The First 10 Years...by Russell Bennett

Today marks the 10th anniversary of when Shannon and I were first married. It was a crazy time ten years ago, we had just found out that our original wedding plans were going to be interrupted by my deployment to Iraq. I was in the Marine Reserve then, an infantry unit, and while in Des Moines for my February drill I learned that we were deploying that summer. I quickly accepted the reality of the situation, but was overcome with fear about ruining our wedding plans that Shannon had been working so hard on. I remember wanting to be put on active duty immediately so I could simply call Shannon instead of having to face her in person.

The normally long drive home wasn't long enough, and the single flight of stairs to our apartment was too short; I entered the door to find her sitting on our futon couch, happy and unsuspecting. She may have started to tell me something, I can't recall, but with a giant lump in my throat and a sudden inability to speak, I hugged her tight and hoarsely whispered in her ear "We leave in June." It was the most difficult thing I'd ever done. Even when on that deployment, facing real potential for injury or death, I was never scared in the same way that I was the day I told her Shannon our wedding plans would be changed.  

Fortunately, Shannon is resilient and stronger than people may suspect, and after we cried it out for a little while that day she was hard at work planning our now expedited wedding plans.  Being only a few weeks away, Shannon told me she might as well have some fun with the situation and our wedding would be on St Patrick’s Day, March 17th.  We agreed to have a small wedding since we had little time to prepare, but follow it up with a bigger vow renewal on our second anniversary.  Everything went well on the day we wed, and to this day I have a vivid image of Shannon in her wedding dress while we stood in front of our closest family and friends.  

We've been through a lot since that day, most of it I never could have predicted. Currently, we are always busy with the kids, the daycare, and my work, but despite all the distraction I still look at Shannon and can’t believe how lucky I am to have her with me. She has been amazingly strong during the difficulties we've encountered, and I’ve never thought there could be a better mother or friend than her.  I am truly fortunate to have Shannon in my life, and her love is my most cherished thing.

Thank you for 10 years, Shannon, and I look forward to sharing our lives for all the rest of them!  

Happy New Year!

Wow!  What a wild ride this year has been.  There is (hopefully) personal growth in every year, but some years it is a small change and others it is quite large.  This year was one of those explosive years.  Though it was not without its setbacks, the general trajectory is miles forward from where we started 365 days ago.

In one year, we:

• Got licensed to become an in-home daycare.
• Grew the daycare business to exactly where we needed to be - and primarily through our friends or referrals - the highest form of a compliment.
• Grew the gun business to more than double the business of last year - again primarily through referrals.
• All of this while maintaining the life coaching business.
• Had a baby turned toddler.
• Lost a family member FAR too soon.
• Went on our first vacation ("stay-cation", really) as a family of 5.
• Had a toddler turned preschooler.
• Had a preschool turned kindergartner.
• Welcomed Great Grandma Annette to Omaha.
• Celebrated Thanksgiving with extended family that we haven't seen in many years.
• Survived our (hopefully only) brush with cancer - everything was benign, but still far too close for comfort!
• Thrived not only as individuals, but also as a married couple and a family.

Russell

One of the factors in my quitting my job to stay home and do in-home daycare full-time was so that Russell could get off of the night shift.  Well, that lasted about a year.  Once Jameson started kindergarten, he realized that he really didn't get to see him except for maybe an hour in the mornings.  So, it was back to nights for him.  But, this time we have a better system in place so that he is able to get more sleep.  And he got back on basically his same crew as before, so that's good!

We had a little health scare with Russell this year.  He had (what he thought were) 2 cysts removed a few months ago in an in-office procedure.  When he went back in for the follow-up, they told him that it was some disease and the cysts were actually benign tumors and the tissue around it contained precancerous cells.  He was told that he was going to need to have a surgery to remove that tissue and a margin around it.

He went in for the surgery.  We were expecting an area of about 6 or 7 inches to be removed, based on what the surgeon drew on his chest.  Right as they were about to wheel him to the operating room, they told him that they needed him to sign one more form - in case they needed to do a skin graft.  WHAT?!?  The surgery took about an hour or two.  The surgeon came out to talk to us.  He said one they got in there, they found that more tissue than they were expecting was affected, but that they did not need a skin graft.  The incision ended up being over a foot long and we later found out that he was actually really close to getting a skin graft.  But, so far everything looks good and Russell is disappointed that this scar, although long, won't be quite as wicked as he had previously imagined.  He'll have some follow-ups, but we're hoping that this is our only brush with cancer!

Shannon

This year, I have made myself a primary focus for the first time in...well, probably ever.  I realized that I had been putting everyone else first at a detriment to myself, so I decided that it was time to make some changes.  These changes were internal, such as becoming more assertive, overcoming fears, defining boundaries, and finding forgiveness - not only for others, but also for myself.  Soooooooo much forgiveness.  There have also been external changes.  I got my lip pierced, am finding my own personal style, and pursuing my own hobbies - when none of these things were important before.

Something that has become very important to me is to carve out time for myself regularly.  For one, I joined Jazzercise.  I relish each day that I am able to get out and do it.  An hour to myself, with adults, is golden.  Plus the endorphin boost from the exercise doesn't hurt either!  Kellie, Jenny, and I have started a monthly "mom's day out."  It is so important to have some time to unwind and to reconnect as friends.  And let me just tell you, I am SOOOOOOOO blessed to have such amazingly loving and supportive friends.  At a time when I was questioning most of the relationships that I had ever foraged, they held me up until I was strong enough to stand on my own two legs.  Seriously, they are AAAAH-MAZING.

Lastly, I am working on identifying and developing my own hobbies.  For so many years, my focus was my education and career and then my children came along and I just never allowed myself the gift of doing anything just for the pure enjoyment.  I've always enjoyed reading, but it just wasn't what I was looking for - I needed something to get me out of the house!  This spring/summer, I threw myself into garden.  Both the vegetable garden in the back and (finally) adding to our landscape.  The vegetable garden flourished and I'm looking forward to seeing how the landscaping looks in the spring.  Probably over 6 years ago, I mentioned to Russell wanting to try archery.  He finally took me this fall.  And I LOVED it!!!  As of this Christmas, thanks to my generous husband, I am the proud owner of a new beautiful pink bow and gear!  I can't wait to break that baby in! 

I can see incredible changes within myself and I'm really liking what I'm seeing!

Jameson

Jameson has had some HUGE changes this year.  He went from being in the 4's classroom to being a preschool graduate.  Then this summer he was officially considered a kindergartner able to go to camp with the school-age kids.  He could not have been more excited.  He went from half days to full day summer camp.  He was quite popular.  He talked about some 5th grade girls that hung out with him and we were told by the camp counselors how much they adored Jameson.  They told us "Jameson is the best!  No seriously, THE best kid."

Then Jameson started kindergarten.  This was a scary leap for me.  He went from preschool where I knew his teachers, had a lot of contact with them, and knew all of his peers.  To Kindergarten, where I had to leave him at the door.  But, I feel much better now that I know how highly his teachers think of him.  Speaking of which, Jameson is officially the most advanced kid in his class in regards to math and he is now able to read simple books.  He is constantly sounding works out.  Jameson has stated that he wants to be an artist when he grows up (among many other things), so we signed him up for art classes after school.  He has made some amazing things.  Where did my baby go??

Delilah

Delilah turned 3 early in the year.  Poor girl, had to wait several weeks for her birthday party because Russell was in DC for the Navy.  And THEN her party was all but snowed out.  But she was a trooper and took it in stride.  And we had a fun time!

Delilah's transition to school was not quite as smooth as Jameson's.  The first week of summer, we signed the kids up for a special week-long animal camp that they could go to together.  Then when their actual summer camps started, Delilah had a hard time because we dropped Jameson off first and then took her to her room.  She was sad every day to be away from Jameson.  She eventually got to the point where she tolerated it, but never seemed to really enjoy being dropped off during the summer.  Once fall came around, she started preschool and her three teachers were teachers that Jameson had at some point.  Delilah was familiar with all of them, so getting her to preschool was a little easier.  But, she used to get really quiet in the 40 minutes between Jameson's drop off and when she needed to be to preschool.  

The good news is that Delilah has since really flourished.  She gets sad on the days that she does not have school.  She talks about all of her friends that she has made in class including her boyfriend (who comes from a well-known Omaha family - what can I say, the girl has good taste!) and her girlfriend.  She tells me that she and one of her friends at school "just laugh and laugh."  I just love that Delilah is really coming into her own.  :-)

Ephraim

Has grown considerably - as all babies do.  In 2013 he has gone from a fairly needy 5 month old baby who only wanted his mama to being a full-blown toddler.  He has developed impeccable comedic timing.  He has figure out how to make a noise by blowing on his arm and he has figured out that the best time to do this is at the dinner table.  He is starting to talk and his favorite word is "LILAH!!" followed closely by "NO!"  He loves playing with the big kids and can usually get them laughing hard.  He is a climber - he sleeps in a pack and play because he can climb out of the crib.  He had turned into such a cuddle bug.  He loves blowing kisses and giving hugs.  And if he really wants your attention, he'll grab you by the cheeks and plant a few kisses on you.  He is by far the biggest Bennett kid in both height and weight at his age and he has a hearty appetite to keep up with it!

2013 has been a growing year for all of us.  I hope that it has treated all of you as well.  My resolution is to keep this forward momentum going and make 2014 our best year yet!!  

Happy New Year!!

A very special man remembered.

Michael David Bennett was Russell's cousin.  Despite Michael ending the four "glorious" years that Russell was the only grandchild, they were close growing up.  I was introduced to Michael when Russell and I started dating back in high school.  During one of those first few visits to Lincoln, I remember Michael expressing his frustration to Russell that it wasn't fair that he had 2 girlfriends (his ex-girlfriend and myself), so he should just go ahead and let Michael have me.  Talk about making a girl feel welcome into the family!  :-)

One of the things that Michael was passionate about was sports - specifically the Huskers.  We would occasionally travel to Lincoln to watch Husker football at Russell's grandma's house with Michael.  During halftime, the boys would go out back and throw the football around.  I went to my very first Red & White game with Russell and Michael.  I will never be able to think of the Huskers without being reminded of Michael.

Another passion of Michael's was music.  Looking at Michael, you would likely not assume that he was a talented musician.  You see, Michael was born with some major challenges.  Including the limited use of his right hand/arm and some hearing loss.  These are not qualities that you would look for in a talent musician.  And yet, he had an amazing ability for music.  I was always in awe of Michael's talent to play by ear.  We asked Michael to play the piano at our wedding.  I gave him a CD of the songs that I wanted played and that was it.  He did an amazing job.  Michael's skills only progressed to the point where he was composing his own songs and made a CD.

Several years ago, Michael excitedly told us about the part-time that he had recently started at 10/11 news - which is a station local to Lincoln.  He was working in the sports department (surprise, surprise - right??).  This part-time gig eventually turned into full-time.  You could tell the dedication that Michael had to the station and the joy that it brought to him.  We knew the love that Michael had for 10/11, but it wasn't until after he passed away that we realized that the feeling was mutual.

A few months ago, Michael was forced to go to the hospital by one of his co-workers.  He was diagnosed with what doctors thought was a bad case of pneumonia, had a surgery to drain fluid from his lungs and was discharged.  At this point, we were able to visit Michael at his house.  A short time after that, Michael was back in the hospital again having fluid drained from his lungs.  Things pretty much went downhill and ultimately they opted to do an exploratory surgery to see what was going on.  They found the culprit - Michael had lymphoma.  However, he just wasn't able to recover from all of the procedures.  So, as we were closing out celebrating Ephraim's 1st birthday and gearing up to celebrate Russell's birthday, we got urgent news that Michael's time on this Earth was coming to an end.  We raced up to Lincoln to find comfort in family.

It's such a juxtaposition to be celebrating the anniversaries of the day two very special guys being given life as we begin to mourn the loss of another very special guy's life. But, I can tell you that all of a sudden all of the petty stuff and life's little annoyances don't seem to matter anymore. I am sad for what has been lost, but I am grateful for the time, love and laughs that we had.

Rest in Peace, Michael.  You will be missed.

The day I said yes.

Ten years ago today, Russell and I were literally days into officially living together.  I carefully zipped myself into my new black dress, assuring that my hair and makeup were just right, as Russell dressed himself in his Marine dress uniform.  You see, I was told that we were going to a retirement party for a fellow Marine, but I had a sneaking suspicion that this day just might be THE day - the day he slipped that engagement ring onto my finger.  I looked down at my my hands and noticed my chipped nail polish.  I knew that I couldn't have that if people were going to be ogling the rock that was about to be slipped on my finger.  I could not find any nail polish remover in the apartment into which we had just moved.  So, on our way to dinner, I made Russell make a quick stop at Target.

Once my nails are appropriately unpolished, we are on our way to dinner.  We head to Mr. C's, a local italian restaurant, which has since sadly closed.  While at the restaurant, Russell says "Oh, I forgot to give you your graduation gift."  (Sidenote: I had graduated from ISU that May and Russell missed my graduation because he had drill with the Marine reserves and couldn't get out of it.)  My heart skipped a beat as he reached into his pocket to retrieve my gift.  My heart sank as I noticed that the gift box was much longer than a ring box.  And I tried my very best to hide my disappointment as I opened the box to reveal a necklace with a heart-shaped pendant (the very one that I still wear to this day).  We finish dinner and head to (what I am now coming to terms with might actually be) the retirement party.

So, we make the drive from Mr. C's in North Omaha to West Omaha.  During this time, another Marine calls looking for directions.  My heart sank a little more.At the time, it annoyed Russell, but it made me start to actually believe that we were, in fact, going to a Marine function.  But, rather than going to Skyline, as I was told, we end up at Zorinsky lake.  Zorinsky has some history for Russell and I.  It was where we ended up on our first date and where we went when Russell broke up with me the summer after our senior year (his reasoning was because I wasn't "the one" - something I still tease him about.  Haha!).  There are 4 entrances to Zorinsky lake off of 156th street, the above 2 events occurred at separate areas.  So, imagine my surprise when he whipped into a 3rd entrance.

Once we are parked, he tells me to hang on a second as he unloads items that I had no idea were stashed in the car - namely a blanket and his acoustic guitar.  He runs back to the car and leads me to the area where he has laid out the blanket.  And despite the people on the trail, he proceeds to serenade me the song Everything by Lifehouse while playing his guitar.  This is a very special treat because he very rarely sings in front of me.  Unfortunately, I don't have a video of the actual event, but this is *almost* as good:

Once he finished singing, he tells me that he has gotten my father's approval and asks for my hand in marriage, while holding a much smaller box than the one he had given me at dinner (which is now referred to as "distraction necklace"), with the most beautiful ring that I have ever seen in it.  I (of course) say yes and we awkwardly get the ring on my finger.  This was followed by a lot of crying, laughing, hugging, and kissing.

But, this was not the end of the surprises for the night.  Our next stop was his parents' house, which I noticed as we pulled up, was surrounded by cars.  I first meet my Dad and Step-Mom on the front porch.  They try to be nonchalant "so, what's new?"  "Russell asked me to marry him!!" I say in a voice that sounded far too whiny in my opinion (due to the crying).  "So, what'd you say??"   This was the question of the night.  :-)  As I walk into Russell's parents' house, I realize that I am surrounded by many of our family and friends.  He not only surprised me with the proposal, he then planned a surprise engagement party!

Still 10 years later, I can't imagine a more perfect day.  And later I realized just how much work went into  the whole thing.  At one point he went down to KC to take my dad out to dinner to ask for my hand.  He went to the jeweler and actually helped design my ring, based on what I had told him that I wanted.  He planned the whole night - including making a special CD for the event.  And he arranged for the surprise engagement party (because we had previously talked about what we had thought about as far as our dream proposals - I wanted something public, like on the screen of a baseball game, but he wanted something more intimate - and he managed to get both elements in on the same night!).

Have things been 100% perfect?  Nope.  But, life is a rollercoaster and nothing makes you appreciate the highs like successfully navigating the lows.  Is there anyone else on this planet that I'd rather have next to me on this crazy ride?  Nope.  I mean, for one, look what I've gained:

Ephraim is 10 months!

The Graduate!

It seems like just yesterday that I was walking Jameson in foe his first day of preschool, holding back tears.  It was such a monumental occasion as he took the first steps of his educational career.  Today was the end of the very first chapter in that journey.  Today is the day that Jameson graduates preschool.

He has been talking about his "show" for weeks.  He has been practicing his songs and he has been inviting just about everyone that he see to come to his "show."

The day of graduation came.  We entered the auditorium with all of the other friends and families of graduates.  Jameson had not just the four of us cheering for him, he also had his Graham-cracker, Papa Terry, Mama O, Nannie, Papa Bruce, and Aunt Rachel there as well.  The teachers took turns speaking about the program and the progress that the students have made over the past year.  They showed a slideshow of the kids (which of course brought a tear to my eye).  The kids sang a few songs.  They took turns dancing in smaller groups.  Jameson danced to the song "I like to move it!"  We also learned that when Jameson grows up, he wants to be a police officer, like daddy.  He wants to take bad guys to jail.  He was so cute, but very serious during most of the ceremony.  He also looked very bored during times that he was not performing.  He later told us that he was not bored, he was just paying attention.

After his graduation, we had some treat at a little reception.  During this, he said goodbye to his preschool friends and his teachers.  I think that Jameson got his first taste of how bittersweet the end of something cal be.  As we let the gym, I caught him tearing up (which, of course, in turn made me cry!!).  We talked about how it's okay to be sad about not seeing your friends all the time, but also being excited for something new (in this case KINDERGARTEN!!).

We had a lovely family lunch at Greenbelly.  This is one of our favorite places to go for a Saturday lunch.  We've gotten to know the owner during our visits.  So, he held a table toward the back for us, had some bruschetta ready, and even got cupcakes for the kids!  All in all, it was a very nice day, even if this Mama isn't ready to admit that she now has a school-ager!!

Ephraim is 9 months!

Jameson is 5!

I can't believe it, my buddy is 5.  FIVE!!  The jump from 4 to 5 has always seemed monumental to me, but it is even more so when it's my very own child.  I can still remember the day he was born so vividly.  It's hard to believe that the precious little bundle of joy that I finally met in person that day is this amazing soon-to-be kindergartener that I know today.

Jameson has got to be just about the sweetest person that I have ever met.  He has such a tender heart.  I find this equally endearing and terrifying.  Basically, it scares me because he has such a pure soul and I don't want to send him out to be tainted by the cruel world.  But, I absolutely love that his best friends are his brother and sister.  I love that he tells me that I look beautiful nearly every day.  I love how excited he gets about just about everything - whether it's riding his bike, playing a game on the Wii, hanging out with the neighbor kids, learning something new, or whatever.  I basically melt when we go to Lincoln to visit Russell's Grandma (Gigi).  Jameson will sit next to her, hold her hand and talk about whatever he is passionate about at the moment.  

He has such a "joie de vivre" or zest for life.  He is RIDICULOUSLY excited to start kindergarten.  He has no fear about not knowing where he's going.  He just knows he's going to love it.  He is always wanting to sign up for extra classes at school.  And once he overcomes a fear (like going under water or down a big slide), he's the first one to step up and help another child do the same.  And any time I mention being sad about something (like MY BABY GOING TO KINDERGARTEN!!!), he tells me that he'll draw me a picture to make me feel better.  Gah, I love that little guy.

Happy 5th birthday, Buddy!

9 years? It feels like 9 minutes...

Alright folks, we are now in the midst of the time of year that I call "celebration alley," which those of you not from the Midwest may not get that it is a play on words of tornado alley.  Every year, January is spent recovering from the craziness of the Thanksgiving/Christmas/Hanukkah season.  Then we start in by celebrating Valentine's day and  Delilah's birthday in February.  March is spent celebrating our anniversary and Jameson's birthday.  And then three weeks later, we round out the season with my birthday in April.  After that, things settle down a little bit until the summer festivities.

Now back to the title of my post.  9 years?  It feels like 9 minutes...under water!  That's one of Russell's famous jokes regarding marriage.  I'm fairly certain it originated with his dad, but I digress.  This year marks our 9 year anniversary.  It's a pretty big milestone in my mind, even though next year is a more universally celebrated milestone.  You see, last year was difficult.  It was really, really rough.  I'm not exaggeration or being dramatic when I say there were points in the last year that I questioned whether or not we would make it to year 9, let alone 10.  I think that we had some growing pains as we transitioned from carefree young adults in our twenties to responsible parents in our thirties.  It was necessary for us to figure out how to strike an amicable balance between our family and us, as a couple.

Alas, we made it to year 9, no matter how narrowly.  And I'm feeling confident that we will make it to 10 and beyond.  I can only speak for myself, but I feel like we have a new appreciation for each other and renewed vigor for our marriage.  We are moving into a new phase of our relationship, now that the kids are getting older and there are no more babies on the horizon.  This will give us an opportunity to shift our focus on to our family as well as our needs as individuals and as a couple.  Also working in our favor is that communication has seemed to improve.  I'm feeling pretty positive that our relationship is currently healthier than it has ever been - which gives me hope for our future.

Enough about that.  This year, I was blown away by the preparation involved in our anniversary.  I had mentioned months ago that I'd like to go see the Lion King musical.  Russell not only remembered that I wanted to go, bought tickets, found childcare, but managed to surprise me with all of this!  It was so nice to have an evening to ourselves - especially after being separated for nearly 3 weeks just a few weeks prior.  We started with dinner at M's pub, then off to see The Lion King, and then we grabbed dessert-to-go at the Cheesecake Factory before picking the kids up.  Once the kids were in bed, we devoured our cheesecake -  Mmmmm!  It was a pretty fantastic night!

Delilah's aDORAble party!!

If you haven't known me for very long you may not be aware of this, but most of you should already know that the military insists on screwing up my life at any chance it gets.  Well, this year did not disappoint in that regard!  :-)  Russell had to go for his annual required training through the military reserves (AT or active training).  The commercials often boast that the reserves only require a "one weekend a month, plus 2 weeks a year" commitment.  I find this hilarious because more often than not, Russell's training is generally closer to 3 weeks.  But, in any case, this year he was scheduled to be gone over Delilah's birthday.  We originally scheduled her party for the first weekend in March (2 weeks after her actual birthday).  Well, once Russell FINALLY got his orders and booked his flights, we realized that he was not going to make it back in time for the planned party.  So, we had to move her party back an additional week - poor thing!

Her party was scheduled for the afternoon of March 10th.  Russell's cousin, Katie, came into town to help out with the kids,so that I was able to run around town finishing up last minute details.  They were predicting a little bit of snow.  Nothing major, I believe it was about 2-4."  I wasn't too worried because they had already over-predicted a couple of snowstorms this winter.  But, the snow started to fall...and fall...and fall.  I think all told, we got about 8" of snow.  It wasn't as bad by our house as some other areas got it.  There were white-out conditions and parts of the interstate closed.  We started receiving cancellations from party guests.  But, the party must go on!  I made this poor pumpkin wait long enough - I wasn't about to cancel it on her!  And honestly at her age, I think she would have been content if her party consisted of just Jameson and her.  :-)

Fortunately, we didn't have very far to drive.  We reserved the Saddlebrook community center for her party.  It's just over a mile North of our house.  A brave few still made it to her party, primarily it was people who lived out our way.   Delilah bounced her little heart out in the bounce house.  They also had out various toys, like a little basketball hoop, a slide, hula hoops, etc.  The kids all seemed to have a blast!  Then it was time to eat and to sing to the birthday girl.

Delilah's birthday shirt spells out three in Dora fabric.  It was made by my friend, Bryn of The Upper Room.

Please forgive me, I worked really hard on her favors and since a lot of Delilah's friends weren't able to come to get them...I'm posting a bunch of pictures here.  :-)

We had favor bags decorated like Backpack.

In each bag there was: a Dora party blower, napkin, stickers, PB&J uncrustables, Dora yogurt, Dora fruit snacks, mini banana (for Boots), string cheese decorated like Map and a wipe to clean their hands before they ate - because who knows what those little monkeys got into!

Map's face on the string cheese was drawn by none-other than my very talented husband.  Of course, AFTER we got to the party location, because that's how he rolls.  :-)

Delilah's cupcakes were baked by her Uncle Ben and decorated by his very talented fiancee, Brooke!

And if that wasn't enough, everyone got to go home with a cookie...Dora, Boots or an Explorer Star.  These were made by my very talented friend, Ashley of Sweet Bites.

...however, very few people waited until they got home to devour their cookies...

Delilah NEEDED a pink star...but, she wouldn't let me take a nice picture of her eating it!

Happy birthday, silly girl!

Ephraim is 7 months!

Delilah is 3!

Three years ago today, I didn't know it yet, but I had the distinct pleasure of meeting the most hilarious, spunky, brave, and stunningly beautiful little girl that I have ever known.  On that day, she changed my life, but in a way that was different that having my first baby.  I had a whole new set of challenges - and I mean so much more than learning how to juggle two sets of needs.  I had to figure out how to fight my maternal urge to shelter my little girl forever and to teach her how to be strong and independent.  I was giddy with the thought of dresses, Mary Jane shoes, and braiding hair.  My stomach knotted at the thought of PMS and broken hearts.  I fought back tears as I thought about shopping for prom dresses and a wedding dress.  And then my heart swelled as I thought about watching my little girl parent children of her own.  Yes, I did realize that I was getting way ahead of myself as I rocked my newborn baby to sleep, but there is just something about the bond between a mother and her daughter.  And in an instant, I could feel the lifelong bond.

Delilah is such an anomaly to me.  It is just amazing to me that she can be so different, yet so much the same.  Put her in a line-up with her brothers and some people would wonder if she was actually related to them.  She stands out with her light hair and sky blue eyes, compared to their dark hair and darker eyes.  But, put her with her cousins and she mixes right in - and she's not even related to half of them by blood!  She is just as head-strong, brave, and loud as Jameson is careful, sensitive, and laid-back.  But, they are two of the most loving individuals that I have ever met.  When Delilah was a baby, I was really sensitive to people comparing her to Jameson.  Jameson was a VERY easy-going baby.  I felt like people were saying that Delilah wasn't a "good" baby (for the record, ALL babies are good babies).  I would, however, say that Delilah was born a diva.  She was a fairly happy and easy going baby...unless she was upset about something.  Then she would screeeeeeeam at the top of her lungs.  We would laugh that she had two volumes - silent and top of her lungs.  She's still kind of like that.  :-)  My favorite story of when I was pregnant with her was that when I would brush my teeth, every time I would lean over the sink to spit or whatever, she would push back against the counter.  It makes a lot of sense now that I've met her!

I know I may be a bit biased, but I think that Delilah is brilliant!  She has so much personality that she can light up just about any room.  She can hold her own with the older kids so well that I often forget that she's "only" 3.  She's very excited to start preschool in the fall.  She already knows how to spell her name, she can recognize all of the letters and numbers.  She knows the days of the week.  She is working with Jameson on counting to 100.  She will go down any slide with no fear.  She loves to climb, run, and jump.  She can do a somersault.  She is a genius with comedic timing.  She is so nurturing, whether it's with a real baby, such as her brother or the babies we watch or when she's tucking one of her baby dolls under a blanket for a nap.   She can quote some of her favorite TV shows.  She likes to run very, very, VERY fast!  She likes spinning in a circle until she falls down.  You can see the pure joy in her when she gets so excited about something and she has such a zest for life that it's hard not to join in the fun when you're around her.  She is so incredibly beautiful, with her curly, dark blonde hair and clear blue eyes.  And my very favorite part, her angelic little voice - especially when she's saying something very thoughtful and deep...or something totally naughty (like "see ya, suckers!")

Happy 3rd birthday, Baby cakes!

{Loved}

I hope everyone had a wonderful Valentine's Day!  It seems odd to say this with my husband out of town, but this may have been one of my best Valentine's days ever!  First of all, look out world, we are raising a true Casanova!  Jameson is going to be a real catch in the romantic department!  He tells me almost on a daily basis that I am beautiful.  He will often find something specific to compliment me on - such as my hair style.  So adorable!!!  But on this particular morning, he woke me up and handed me an envelope.  "Open it," he says excitedly.  I open the envelope to find a green piece of construction paper folded up inside.  On the paper he has drawn two stick figures.  "It's your 'balentine.'  I drew a picture of me and you.  Oh and look, the paper is your favorite color!"  Oh yes, I melt into a giant puddle right there.

Then we talk about what he's going to wear to school.  Over winter break, he went to an at class at school and they painted shirts.  Delilah was also enrolled in this class, but couldn't go the day they painted shirts because she was sick.  So, Jameson decided to paint a picture of Delilah on his shirt.  This in itself is adorable.  But, today Jameson informs me that he wants to wear his shirt with Delilah on it.  I asked him why.  He says "Because I wuv her and she's my balentine."  Oh my gosh, where did this kid come from??  I just love how much they love each other!

As if that wasn't enough, then my daycare kiddos start showing up.  Not only did my kids get spoiled by our daycare families, but I also got a little something from one family.  They told me that I deserve a little pampering.  So sweet to be thought of when I can't be with my Valentine on Valentine's day!  Then I notice that I have a little message from the hubby on my FB page.  This is very out of character for him because he's not a big fan of FB PDAs.  But he stepped out of his comfort zone a little bit to make me feel special.  In addition to that, I also received several sweet text messages today!

Now, I'm sure one of the reasons that I had such a wonderful day was that I had very low expectations.  I'm not saying this to be a jerk, but history has taught me that although my husband may have good intentions, his follow through can sometimes leave something to be desired.  (I will say, however, that when he gets it right, he definitely gets it right!)  :-)  But, I can't even describe my shock when I spy a woman walking to the front door carrying a GORGEOUS arrangement of flowers!  Let me just tell you that Russell has NEVER sent me flowers and I'm fairly certain that I haven't received anything floral from him for Valentine's day since high school.  I was expecting just a phone call today and I was showered with Valentine's day surprises all day long!  

Though we've definitely seen our share of ups and downs, as we navigate this roller coaster of life.  I can honestly say that today I felt like the luckiest girl in the world.  I am so grateful to be surrounded by such wonderful people who made today a very special day.  I am definitely feeling loved today!  Although, the bar has now been set very high for future Valentine's days!!!  :-)

I think it's safe to say that a good day was had by all in the *B* household today!  :-)

Super Salad!

Okay, so the title of the post is from a little family joke that we have.  One day My Dad, Step-mom  Brother and I were out to dinner.  My brother ordered and the waiter asks "Soup or salad?"  My brother answers "Yes."  The waiter asks again "Soup or salad?"  My brother responds a little louder "Yes."  This happened so long ago that I can't actually remember how long this went on, but you get the idea.  But, eventually it got resolved and my brother told us that he thought the waiter was asking if he wanted the "super salad," so that's why he kept saying yes.  So, there you go.  A funny little story from the Perkins history that really doesn't have much to do with this post aside from the fact that it's about salad.  :-)

Instead of a super salad, I'm talking about my adventures in mason jar salads.  A while back, when I still worked outside the home, we had some training sessions and one included a talk on wellness.  Now, the guy who spoke ultimately was trying to recruit everyone to use his chiropractic services, but aside from that, I really liked what he had to say.  His philosophies were pretty much in line with my own - eat healthy, non-processed foods, eat as organically as you can, eat grass-fed meats, and use heart-healthy oils.  Love it!  Most of it was review for me, but I really do enjoy when people reinforce my beliefs.  Haha!  But, there was one thing that he said that I had never considered before.

He talked about all of the different nutrients in foods (protein/fat/carbs/etc.) and how our bodies use them.  He explained that carbs give us energy and the average American diet has it all wrong.  We eat super carb-heavy dinners and then go to bed shortly after that.  We don't use much energy in the evening or while we sleep.  He said that the way we should be eating is to have our carbs in the morning and afternoon, when we need the energy and our dinners should be low carb.  I had never thought of it like that before!  But, it made a lot of sense!  So, I discussed this with Russell and we decided that we should start eating salads for dinner (since that would be something easy for him to take to work).

Enter Pinterest where mason jar meals are running rampant.  I even have a Pinterest board devoted to mason jar meals.  I am, however, not so keen at following directions.  I often take a recipe as inspiration and then put my own twist on it.  The problem is, very rarely do my creations turn out the same twice.  Ask my college roommate, Kellie.  I once made this delicious concoction out of the leftovers from taco night.  I do remember that it consisted of rice, cheese, sour cream and taco meat.  We scooped it up with Doritos (hey, this was college, remember?) and it was freaking AHHHHH-MAZING!!!! Sadly, I have never quite been able to recreate it.  (That really doesn't have anything to do with salad, does it?  Oh well.)

Anyway, I read up on the basics of the mason jar salad.  You put the wet and sturdier ingredients on the bottom, like the dressing, the meat, fruits and/or veggies.  Then you put the things that need to stay for the most part dry at the top, such as the lettuce.  Then I put the things that you want to stay crunchy in a baggie - like croutons or nuts.  Then I perused the menus of some of my favorite places to get salads (like Panera, Runza, or Green Belly) and used that as a starting point.

My first go at this mason jar salad thing was two weeks ago:

#1 is an Asian salad - toasted sesame dressing in the bottom, chicken, green onions, Russell's had mandarin orange (or clementines, maybe?) segments, & greens. You can see the rubber band on that one, that held a baggie of chow mein noodles and slivered almonds to it. 
#2 is bruschetta on the bottom (tomatoes, garlic, basil, and balsamic vinaigrette) and lettuce. I did an Italian-style breaded chicken breast cut up and I made some croutons out of a leftover piece of garlic bread. 
#3 is poppy seed dressing, chicken, blueberries, strawberries and the "7 super foods" salad mix from Costco. 
#4 is buffalo chicken, blue cheese, diced celery & carrots, and salad. I added some ranch on the day of. 
#5 is chicken with a Thai peanut sauce, red bell peppers, cucumbers, green onion, salad mix and the day of I mixed in cashews and chow mein noodles.

I was quite pleased with the results!  The jars actually kind of sealed themselves!  You had to pop the lid off to eat them.  It was nice to just grab a jar, dump it in a bowl and dinner was done!  Plus it looks so pretty and colorful in the fridge.  I ate the last salad like a week after putting them in the jars and it was just as fresh as the first one...seriously!  I love, love, love this!  And my second go at it was much less cumbersome than the first one.  :-)

I do have a couple of repeats this week:
#1 Asian Salad, like above.
#2 Bruschetta salad, like above, but I forgot that I did the breaded chicken last time, so I added diced chicken breast.
#3 The poppyseed dressing with berries, like above...except Costco didn't have the "7 super foods" salad mix, so I just used lettuce.
#4 Once I realized that I was going to have extra Italian chicken, I threw together a Caprese salad (fresh mozzarella  basil, balsamic vinaigrette) with some lettuce and I'll add the chicken and homemade croutons on the day of.
#5 Salmon in balsamic vinaigrette and spinach.  On the day of, I'll add walnuts and dried cranberries.
I made 2 of each (I at one for lunch, leaving 9.  :-)  I should be set for the week!

And then, because I'm a show-off, you can see the smoothies that I have for breakfast on the right.  In case anyone is wondering, that includes: frozen berries, Greek yogurt, tart cherry juice (I SWEAR by this!!), and a scoop of protein powder.  I used to add either chia seed or flax seed, but I ran out and keep forgetting to get more.  So, there you go!  My adventures in mason jar salads!  I have a whole list of recipes that I want to try, so I'll keep you all updated!!  :-)

Ephraim is 6 months...and 7 days

 Oh man, I am even further behind on this than I was last month!  Anyway, so much has changed in just a month!!  As you can see, Ephraim can now sit up.  He was pretty wobbly at first, but now he's pretty dang sturdy...unless one of his siblings bowls him over!  He doesn't do so much rolling anymore.  He flips on to his belly and then that little bugger drags himself all across the room.  He wants so badly to keep up with those bigger kids!

Ephraim got his first taste of solid food.  His first bite was of avocado.  Although he made a face, he gobbled it up!  He has pretty much done that with every food he has tried - made a face and scarfed it down!  Come on, does this look like a kid who does like to eat?  So far, he has tried avocado, squash, apples, bananas, and sweet potatoes.  He broke out into a rash the day he tried banana, but I'm going to have to try it again before I'm prepared to rule that he's allergic to it.  This kids now thinks he's ready for steak dinners.  You have to watch him because he'll dive after any food within reach.  He also likes to hold the spoon and really tries to feed himself!

He still adores his big brother and sister.  He'll make little noises to try and get their attention and he's always flashing them his big goofy smile.  They are MUCH more likely to get him into a fit of giggles than his mommy or daddy.  Ephraim is starting to babble.  He's quite the little talker.  Big brother, Jameson, tells us that he's talking already "[Gasp], did you hear that?  He said Jay-Muh-Son!"  I don't hear what J hears just yet, but I doubt it's too long before he's chiming in with the other two!  Oh and Delilah is convinced that he should be talking because he now has teeth - Ephraim has cut 2 teeth already, BTW!

Happy half birthday, Ephraim!

Life.

I know it's been quiet over here.  Sometimes life can just get in the way.  I needed to take a little time for myself.  But, I'm back!  (I think, anyway.)  I plan to get caught up starting tomorrow.  A special someone turned 6 months old and we had a fun-filled weekend last weekend.  If I post this, then that means I HAVE to update tomorrow, right?  :-)

A Dream Finally Realized

Almost exactly 7 years ago, I quit a very stressful and all-consuming job as the residential coordinator of a few group homes serving individuals with developmental disabilities.  My job was so stressful that I quit without finding another job.  I had built up enough leave (because I wasn’t ever able to take any time off!) that I had 6 weeks built up.  I was confident that I could find something in that time.  This was the first time I remember looking up the requirements to become an in-home daycare.

Obviously I found a different job and did not follow through with the in-home daycare idea at that time.  But, I came back to it several times at various points in my life.  Generally, I would revisit it as I became dissatisfied with my job or following the birth of one of our children. 

After Delilah was born, we had to reevaluate our childcare situation.  In order to afford to pay for childcare, I would have had to switch to work full-time, which made absolutely no sense to me.  Russell switched to an overnight shift, that way one of us was home with the kids at all times.  However, after about a year of working nights and getting up earlier than he’d like so that I could go to work began to wear on him and a new arrangement was necessary.  We knew that we wanted to have a third baby; therefore we didn’t want to make any drastic changes prior to that.  But, the idea kept lingering in my mind and I just couldn’t let it go.  Could I actually go through with my plan to become an in-home daycare?

Then an opportunity arose for me to watch a few kids in the morning before I had to go to work.  I thought this was a good plan because I could get me feet wet in regards to the whole daycare thing and I could make a little extra money!  I had such a fun time doing activities with the kids, and my kids liked having friends come over every day.  I really felt like I was on the right path.

Once I became pregnant with Ephraim it was time to start planning the transition.  We decided that it made sense to just quit my job when I would have left for maternity leave and start the daycare process.  It took a few months after he was born to get back on my feet.  This made me nervous and I did, at one point, worry that we would never get everything together.  But, we did.  And once the worker called to schedule an inspection, I was ready to go!  Actually, I think she was impressed with how prepared I was.  And all of our hard work paid off because we were licensed later that day!  Little Sprouts Clubhouse is officially open!

It’s a thing of beauty, isn’t it?

Ephraim is 5 months...and 6 days... :-)

Sorry, things have been a bit hectic and I got a little behind on E's monthly posts.  Eek!  So, as usual, my Buddha buddy is a big guy.  I recently found the stats from Jameson's 9 month appointment.  At that time, J weighed 18.8 lbs.  What??  Ephraim weighs over 19 lbs at 5 months!!  Craziness!  Anyway, as I posted earlier, Ephraim is a rolling fool.  He easily rolls from back to tummy, but he gets frustrated on his belly.  He CAN roll from belly to back, but he has to get mad first.  At bedtime, I let him his fuss for a little while, and he usually goes to sleep on his own.  However, it cracks me up because I'll lay him down with his head facing East on one side of the crib.  Then later, I will go check on his and his head will be facing South West on the completely other side of the crib.  Apparently he's really on the move, but only in secret!  :-)

Ephraim looooooooves attention.  He'll make noises until you look at him and once you do, he'll flash you his big gummy smile.  He also started doing what we call his "happy dance."  He'll shake his head back and forth super fast while flashing a huge smile.  It's pretty much the funniest thing that I've ever seen.  Ephraim seem to be a lover of music.  If he's not happy, he'll often cheer right up if one of his siblings sings to him or if Daddy plays the guitar for his.  At bedtime, I can get his to settle down and relax into sleep by singing softly to him.

Poor buddy has had a rough few weeks lately.  The kids have all been battling this upper respiratory junk for a while.  A couple of weeks ago it developed into a yucky cough.  All of that, plus he's working on his first tooth.  But really other than just before bedtime, he doesn't let it slow him down too much!

Next month, Ephraim will be 6 months and starting solid foods.  Simply unbelievable!

New Year, New Me!

I'm surprised by all of the hate toward New Year's resolutions that I have seen over the past few days.   It's funny to me because it goes something like this - I hate New Year's resolutions, but here are mine...  Honestly, I don't really get it. It's just coming up with a list of goals that you hope to accomplish in the next year.  It's up to you how lofty you want to make them or whether or not you actually follow through.  Maybe it's the life coach in me, but I feel lost if I'm not working toward something.  And although I don't think it's necessarily essential to make a New Year's resolution, I do think there is something cathartic about starting fresh and looking forward to a new year.

For me, 2012 was...educational.  It was a twisty, turvey, and at times, painful journey, but I believe that it ultimately led me right where I needed to be.  I also feel like, for the first time in a very long time, that I'm on a clear path toward becoming my ideal.  I take great comfort in both of these things.  In thinking about my resolutions for the New Year, I am struck by how different this year is starting than prior years.  In the past, I'd set the typical "I want to eat less, exercise more, and organize my house" -type resolutions.  But not this year!  I'm already well on my way with those things.  (Yay me!)

But here's the big area that I plan on focusing on in the coming year (and beyond) - myself.  I have always been a caring person.  In fact, I have been known to give and give to those around me at my own expense.  Up until this last year, I was under the misguided belief that people were inherently good.  I did anything in my power for the people around me and I truly thought that, if the situation arose, those people would do the same for me.  I was wrong.  A chain of unrelated events occurred this year that nearly brought me to my breaking point and I needed to rely on strength from my support system.  There was a very distinct divide between those who were willing to support me and those that were far more concerned about themselves and their own selfishness.

This discovery made me realize that I needed to get the negativity out of my life.  I came to the realization that I was more concerned about the needs of others more than my own.  I was sacrificing myself for the benefit of my circle of trust - no matter how poorly they treated me.  Once this all became clear to me, I decided that it was time to focus my energy on the positive and uplifting people around me.  I need to make myself a priority and treat myself as well as I treat others.  I'm to the point now that I've let go of the hurt and anger - which is HUGE for me because I have a tendency to hold a bit of a grudge (I'll pause to wait for anyone who has heard the story of my 8th grade solo to stop laughing...).  Anyway, I now know that their loss is far greater than anything I'm missing.  Because I have come to accept that I'm a good person and a fantastic friend and everything that went down was in no way a result of a flaw in myself...other than choosing to associate with negative people, I suppose.  :-)

So, the short story is that my resolutions are to continue what I'm doing.  I want to continue to track my food, make getting some sort of daily activity a priority, continuing to streamline and simplify my house, continue to put some effort into my appearance, to focus my energies on the positive people in my life, to continue cutting the toxic people out, and to continue treating myself with the love and respect that I show to others.

As you can see, 2012 was a wild ride for me.  I am so excited to see what 2013 has in store.  Happy New Year to you and yours!